The sweaty bum crack dillema
Posted 21-07-2008 at 10:56 AM by XSorXpire
I have a hangover.
I didn't drink any alcohol last night.
I think i gassed myself!
My bottom smells.
The food here (in Griffith NSW) is all italian. As much as i like italian food it makes me fart.
The flavour and spices in the rich italian food make it taste divine, but fail to fade prior to being released in gas form and reintoduced through my nostrils. (I cant help but inhale, grade and search for the "flavours" in each dense, cloudy bomb).
Add the farts to the settling in period for my stomach and i produce very sloppy poo and skid marks.
Sloppy poo and skid marks in the toilet bowl i can live with, i even scrub them free.
But skid marks in my jocks is a whole new problem.
Actually, the problem is more that i am a "FAT BASTARD" now.
I weigh 95kg.
95kg of fat arse means sweaty bum crack.
Though it makes me uncomfortable i can live with sweaty bum crack.
I mean what choice do i have?
The sweaty bum crack dilemma is much more unattractive than just a wettish stripe in my boxer shorts. Even worse than having to pick my sweat soaked boxers out of my fat bum while smiling at a client.
Even the chance of crack sweat-rash is not as frightening as the problem i am faced with.
Sweaty bum crack AND skid marks.
I dont know that i should draw the picture in your heads. But a single stripe or even a group of parrallel lines will only remain that way if given a chance to dry in their natural state. Once you add any quantiy of moisture or liquid the result in infinately different.
The lines blur.
The definition fades.
The result is a kind of brown shading throughout the crutch area of your boxers.
It is seriously unattractive!
I feel sorry for my nuts, so i've joined the gym.
I didn't drink any alcohol last night.
I think i gassed myself!
My bottom smells.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spuddy
why have you got a smelly bum XS?
The flavour and spices in the rich italian food make it taste divine, but fail to fade prior to being released in gas form and reintoduced through my nostrils. (I cant help but inhale, grade and search for the "flavours" in each dense, cloudy bomb).
Add the farts to the settling in period for my stomach and i produce very sloppy poo and skid marks.
Sloppy poo and skid marks in the toilet bowl i can live with, i even scrub them free.
But skid marks in my jocks is a whole new problem.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maxo
do i sense another toilet paper rant?
I weigh 95kg.
95kg of fat arse means sweaty bum crack.
Though it makes me uncomfortable i can live with sweaty bum crack.
I mean what choice do i have?
The sweaty bum crack dilemma is much more unattractive than just a wettish stripe in my boxer shorts. Even worse than having to pick my sweat soaked boxers out of my fat bum while smiling at a client.
Even the chance of crack sweat-rash is not as frightening as the problem i am faced with.
Sweaty bum crack AND skid marks.
I dont know that i should draw the picture in your heads. But a single stripe or even a group of parrallel lines will only remain that way if given a chance to dry in their natural state. Once you add any quantiy of moisture or liquid the result in infinately different.
The lines blur.
The definition fades.
The result is a kind of brown shading throughout the crutch area of your boxers.
It is seriously unattractive!
I feel sorry for my nuts, so i've joined the gym.
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