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Thread: Advice for young girlfriends

  1. #1
    M.A.D Founder Rooster's Avatar
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    "Advice For Young Girlfriends"

    Q: How do I know if I'm ready for sex?
    A: Ask your boyfriend. He'll know when the time is
    right. When it comes to love and sex, men are much
    more responsible, since they're not as emotionally
    confused as women. It's a proven fact.

    Q: Should I have sex on the first date?
    A: YES. Before if possible.

    Q: What exactly happens during the act of sex?
    A: Again, this is entirely up to the man. The
    important thing to remember is that you must do
    whatever he tells you without question. Sometimes,
    however, he may ask you to do certain things that may
    at first seem strange to you. Do them anyway.

    Q: How long should the sex act last?
    A: This is a natural & normal part of nature, so don't
    feel ashamed or embarrassed. After you've finished
    making love, he'll have a natural desire to leave you
    suddenly, & go out with his friends to play golf. Or
    perhaps another activity, such as going out with his
    friends to the bar for the purpose of consuming large
    amounts of alcohol & sharing a few personal thoughts
    with his buddies. Don't feel left out -- while he's
    gone you can busy yourself by doing laundry, cleaning
    the apartment, or perhaps even going out to buy him an
    expensive gift. He'll come back when he's ready.

    Q: What is "afterplay"?
    A: After a man has finished making love, he needs to
    replenish his manly energy. "Afterplay" is simply a
    list of important activities for you to do after
    lovemaking. This includes lighting his cigarette,
    making him a sandwich or pizza, bringing him a few
    beers, or leaving him alone to sleep while you go out
    and buy him an expensive gift.

    Q: Does the size of the penis matter?
    A: Yes. Although many women believe that quality, not
    quantity, is important, studies show this is simply
    not true. The average erect male penis measures about
    three inches. Anything longer than that is extremely
    rare and if by some chance your lover's sexual organ
    is 4 inches or over, you should go down on your knees
    and thank your lucky stars and do everything possible
    to please him, such as doing his laundry, cleaning his
    apartment and/or buying him an expensive gift.

    Q: What about the female orgasm?
    A: What about it? There's no such thing. It's a myth.


  2. #2
    Member Fastgirl's Avatar
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    Ahhhh such words of wisdom!
    Quote Originally Posted by Red_is_Best View Post
    hahah I hate it when they do that and you make some noises like you had it done just last year, then they give you that look, like you are a bad vagina owner and you should take better care of it!

  3. #3
    Inactive Member ONYERBIKE's Avatar
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    Would have thought this would be something that TurboR1 would post haha
    If you've put yourself in a position where someone has to see you in order for you to be safe -- to see you, and to give a fuck -- you've already blown it." -- Neal Stephenson,

  4. #4
    Inactive Member BadKitty's Avatar
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    Hahahahahahahahahaha now thats something they should teach in Sex Ed!!!

  5. #5
    Taz
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    Would have thought this would be something that TurboR1 would post haha
    [/b]

    try as he might turbor1 just cant get himself young girlfriends (his wife objects to it)




    now rooster on the other hand is fighting them off
    A site all parents should check regulary
    http://www.mako.org.au/temp_a.html

    (+)

  6. #6
    Member TurboR1's Avatar
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    Q. What is afterplay?
    A. Sleep.


    As for the rest of you fuckers.... Oh wait that icon is not available right now... I'll get all of you.
    The universe likes speed. Don't delay. Don't second guess. Don't doubt. When the opportunity is there, when the impulse is there, when the intuitive nudge from within is there, act.

    Racer #71

  7. #7
    Inactive Member mesaboogie's Avatar
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    I'll send it to the education minister... hopefully introduce it into the high school curriculum, save future generations the waste of time and effort, that could have been invested in a much sluttier target, of many a man before him...

    there&#39;s still 2 on my "To Do" list... <_<
    "I could have been anything. I could have been a fisherman. Fishermen, they get up in the morning, they fish, they sell fish, they smell fish. Reminds me of a girl I used to go with, Yvonne. She smelled like fish"


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