Rectum Stretcher

[Bushman]

Rectum stretcher


While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ‘He asked.

'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'

Traffic Ticket - $95.00
Court Costs - $45.00
Look on the Cop's Face...............PRICELESS

Have a good day

[Geeza]

Nice

[Thirsty]

Reminds me of the single lady who went to the sex shop looking for something new. She looked around but couldnt find anything sje hadnt tried.
On the way out the assistant asked if he could help. She explained she was looking for something new.

He reached under the counter and pulled out a shiny metal box.

Oooh whats that? she asked

Its a Magic Penis, just say Magic Penis, and what ever you ask it will do. Doesnt need batterys, will never go flat. Its Magic!

Ill take it she giggled.

She got back to her car and started driving home. Deciding she couldnt wait, she thought she would try it out. She opened the lid, and said Magic Penis, titty fuck me.

It magically jumped out of the box, down her top and went to town rodgering her clevage.

Ooh this IS wonderfull she thougt, lets see what it can really do... Magic Penis, fuck me, fuck me hard. So the magic penis went to town.

She was getting close to orgasm, weaving across the road, when Mr Plod notices and pulls her over.

What in high horses do you think you're doing driving like that? Plod asks

Oh its this magic penis... its so wonderful, i just say what I want to do and it does it.

Mr Plod not impressed replies.... Magic Penis My Arse!!!!

[Algy]

Mr Plod not impressed replies.... Magic Penis My Arse!!!!

but was the magic penis 6 feet wide?

[Thirsty]

Probably... Its magic....



sheesh!!!

[MMorgan]

superb lol you it is very funny and makes the sens.