BWTK - Bunnings Deathmatch.

[Sprint]

I thought plumbing was aisle 11? Or was it 14...
May call for a reconnaissance mission before the battle to get the plan sussed.
Mind you, then it's pre-meditated murder.
You get 6 months prison for that now (Vs 10 years for fitting up a F.E.)

S.

[wannabee]

We need to sell the rights of this game to a chinese tv company coz
A) They would legally somehow find a way to air it,
B ) You cant tell me chinese and Japanese Game shows do not absolutely PoWn all shows in Aus and
C) it would be damn hilarious to see how the Chinese would go about this compared to Aussies!

Ill throw my hand up to be Red corners Trainer!

[Barfridge]

*BUMP*
For Professor Redfern

[Commander Keen]

Clearly it's all about the chainsaws. Get yourself some high ground and nothing will touch you.

[Barfridge]

except the fire underneath you...and then you have nowhere to go.

[Commander Keen]

I have some thinking to do.

Edit: Ok here we go.

For distraction/vision impairment

And



For teh pwning


and

combined with

[speed3]

Paint aisle 1st, camo paint yourself, shadecloth camo painted with leaves/fronds threaded through it. Hide in the palms in the garden section with small axe.


Ambush with axe to the skull and drag back into the bushes. No one is the wiser.

[mark00001]

1. run into store, grab nearest sharp object for immediate danger
2. proceed to bathroom section via isle with cable ties
3. grab tea towels and cable tie to feel for stealth mode
4. stealthy run to grab fire extinguishers, and set up around the store with cable ties, creating a shroud of dry chem powder in the air
5. run to grab a bamboo torch, matches, string and bottles of citronella lamp oil, set up lamp with string secured to the lamp, pour excess oil on the floor surrounding the lamp, then light the lamp and hide awaiting your prey
6. prey arrives, inspects lamp, you trip lamp, setting alight the floor and prey
7. victory pelvic thrusts as prey screams and burns to death
8. raid fridge in cafe section for a beverage

or..

run to grab a wheelie bin, get gas bottle, put gas bottle into wheelie bin and open the valve, set up torch away from wheelie bin for the nemesis to find, cut power to lighting in store, knock things off shelf for distraction, hide... nemesis finds torch and uses it proceeds to find wheelie bin in his path, inspects its contents and bam!

[Smiffy]

3. grab tea towels and cable tie to feel for stealth mode

Your gonna be on your arse in a matter of seconds...

[mark00001]

Your gonna be on your arse in a matter of seconds...

never heard of skating?

[Commander Keen]

Yeah, all of that takes far too long.

1x dry powder unit can be operated in one hand and will give you enough of a distraction in a face to face. Have you ever got that shit in your eyes? It sucks balls.

Then it's just a matter of shovel/hatchet/claw hammer/sack of doorknobs to the face

[Sulph]

Clearly it's all about the chainsaws. Get yourself some high ground and nothing will touch you.

Star wars inspired or what?

[Tic]

Id stop by isle 18 and get me a true blue long handle shovel and a fiskars X75 camping axe.
Then get myself down to aisle 15 for some sample tins of taubmans paint ( only ones that are metal. ) for throwing at people.
If i had time id hit up aisle 38 and put together a spud gun to shoot the sample tins at people for extra ouch. You can get the fly spray from 22 to help launch the sample tins.

I spend alot of time at Bunnings.

[spudda]

Run to the tradies end, once said nemisis is looking through the shelves get on the forklift and ram the end domino styles untill it goes. Sit back and bask in all your Cafe assorted goodness while buxoum wenches throw themselves at your manlyness only matched by the likes of Koola

[quadeyquade]

for what its worth, the paslode nailguns are shit at range even with the good ones.

[baxter]

amatures...


using tack welded nails to make caltrops herd your foe into the "kill zone" which is an area of shelving set up with christmas lights that have sections of wire stripped to entangle and subdue your nemisis.

then while he/ she is flailing about getting electrocuted you unleash the "scatter gun" ,which is a spud gun but insted of a solid projectile you use a plug of wadding to seal the explosive gas in the chamber. in front of the wad you pour in most of the fixing isle worth of nails, bolts and screws...

[Phildo]

So..... you and a nemesis walk into a Bunnings store. Run in opposite directions and return with a "weapon" you have found in one of the isles of the Bunnings and FIGHT TO THE DEATH!!!

Where do you run???

Towards the checkout area.

What do you grab???

One of the checkout chicks. Bunnings always has at least one hot chick at the front of the shop. The bigger shops have several. There's enough for everyone.

Deathmatch can wait when there are Bunnings hotties around.

However, if you are going to ignore the ladies and do deathmatch stuff instead, then you at least want to duck out the front and get some food first. Can't kill people on an empty stomach.



PS: Bunnings' slogan is, "Lowest prices are just the beginning." Don't you wish that brothels tried the same attitude?

[Dr. Venkman]

she will be running around in circles making noises like the dude from Home Improvement and buzzing the blade, cutting up boxes and shit.

I do it all the time in Bunnings, gives Missus Venkman the shits!

PS: Bunnings' slogan is, "Lowest prices are just the beginning." Don't you wish that brothels tried the same attitude?

Don't you be giving Bunning any ideas now, bad enough that I am not allowed in their unsupervised, if they get hookers in there too blokes will never be allowed to set foot in the place again, on pain of death from their wives or nasty, nasty, nasty things being done to their testicles

Rope
Safety goggles and gas mask and gloves
bag of cement
wide blade shovel

Climb to the top of the racks with all the gear above
Split cement bag in half
Wait for nemesis to come past, drop 1/2 bag of cement.
If only blinded, rapel down the rope, repeatedly massage nemesis skull with the shovel

[imitch]

2 claw hammers, 1 to absorb the chainsaw blow, jamming the teeth in the metal head, and the second claw hammer to deal out some justice, lightweight silent but also effective as a projectile

[DrShan]

Hmm... 1. Walk into bunnings and see said nemesis..
2. Leave and go to Masters where the girls are prettier.