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Thread: For funny emails/jokes/vids/pics - that dont deserve their own thread

  1. #14481
    Member Macey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Halo_2 View Post
    A sex party in silicon valley? Anti-climatic much?

    Today's NSFW joke:

    Yeah? You like that? I said as I watched my come run down my wives chin.
    "Certainly not!" She replied "the fuck is in this sandwich?"

  2. #14482
    Member keys's Avatar
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    BITCOIN ? *

    A lot of monkeys lived near a village.

    One day a merchant came to the village to buy these monkeys!

    He announced that he will buy the monkeys @ $100 each.

    The villagers thought that this man is mad.

    They thought how can somebody buy stray monkeys at $100 each?

    Still, some people caught some monkeys and gave it to this merchant and he gave $100 for each monkey.

    This news spread like wildfire and people caught monkeys and sold it to the merchant.

    After a few days, the merchant announced that he will buy monkeys @ 200 each.

    The lazy villagers also ran around to catch the remaining monkeys!

    They sold the remaining monkeys @ 200 each.

    Then the merchant announced that he will buy monkeys @ 500 each!

    The villagers start to lose sleep! ... They caught six or seven monkeys, which was all that was left and got 500 each.

    The villagers were waiting anxiously for the next announcement.

    Then the merchant announced that he is going home for a week. And when he returns, he will buy monkeys @ 1000 each!

    He asked his employee to take care of the monkeys he bought. He was alone taking care of all the monkeys in a cage.

    The merchant went home.

    The villagers were very sad as there were no more monkeys left for them to sell it at $1000 each.

    Then the employee told them that he will sell some monkeys @ 700 each secretly.

    This news spread like fire. Since the merchant buys monkey @ 1000 each, there is a 300 profit for each monkey.

    The next day, villagers made a queue near the monkey cage.

    The employee sold all the monkeys at 700 each. The rich bought monkeys in big lots. The poor borrowed money from money lenders and also bought monkeys!

    The villagers took care of their monkeys & waited for the merchant to return.

    But nobody came! ... Then they ran to the employee...

    But he has already left too !

    The villagers then realised that they have bought the useless stray monkeys @ 700 each and unable to sell them!

  3. #14483
    Member chew's Avatar
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    They hung a sign up in our town "If you live it up, you won't live it down"-Tom Waits
    Likes CbrRider81, Goliath liked this post

  4. #14484
    Member Hillz's Avatar
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    nah guys say lets take it easy today boys.. then as soon as the wheels roll death race mode activates, its not our fault its in the dna

    even worse on the dirt, if you fall off its just pain, laughter and 3 cubes of roost as ya mates go by
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    Likes CbrRider81 liked this post

  5. #14485
    Member Halo_2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phildo View Post
    This is the biggest problem with this “metoo” shit women love to test men, break their balls and play mind games. If you don’t pick up their shit signals and make a move then your a soft cock.

    The signal I got was “I prefer if you never speak to me again” next time I saw her “Fuck off” then had her ex tell me she loves me

    Same thing happened to a psb member I wasn’t there but from his post basically f*ck off so he got her number off a friend now their married.

    Or even as apprentice one of the guys playing football was telling us how one chick wanted to do the whole football team and lucky for them they recorded it cause she changed her mind and went to the police saying she was raped.

    There is even a app now for relationships agreements
    "Some people are like clouds. When they disappear it's a beautiful day"

  6. #14486
    Member Cone Cat's Avatar
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    Q: How many MOP's does it take to change a light bulb?

    A: Just one, though the phone will need to download/install the "how to change a lightbulb" app before assigning the task to it's meat puppet.

    Q: How does a male MOP find it's penis?

    A: The phone uses the "iMagnify" app to spot the flesh coloured pube.

    Q: Why did the MOP cross the road?

    A: Because the phone wanted to get to the other side.

    Q: How often does a MOP need an upgrade?

    A: Never. Apparently meat puppets can last up to 100 years.

    Q: What is the difference between a person and an MOP?

    A: The person will find these jokes amusing.

  7. #14487
    Member Hillz's Avatar
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    this guy is a bit of a fucking joke now, maybe he can go cry with Adam goodes

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  8. #14488
    Member pnork's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hillz View Post
    this guy is a bit of a fucking joke now
    Always was.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gippo
    cuntoxly
    Likes Para045 liked this post

  9. #14489
    Member GsxInShed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hillz View Post
    this guy is a bit of a fucking joke now.......

    Aww c'mon he had a rough childhood and comes from a low socioeconomic area.... where all he could do was hang at the gym and beat people up.

    At least he's good at one thing....
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."

  10. #14490
    Member AZAZL's Avatar
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    WTF is Danny Green doing on reality TV shit.

  11. #14491
    Member GsxInShed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZAZL View Post
    WTF is Danny Green doing on reality TV shit.
    Why..?

    'Cause an underperforming brainstorm program has to occasionally dredge the bottom of the barrel to attempt to gratify viewers with a passing interest in the protagonists.

    Did you say reality TV..? this shit is not even close to reality......wtf??

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by AZAZL View Post
    WTF is Danny Green doing on reality TV shit.
    Why..?

    'Cause an under performing brainstorm program,close to failure... has to occasionally dredge the bottom of the barrel to attempt to gratify viewers with a passing interest in the protagonists.

    Did you say reality TV..? this shit is not even close to reality......wtf??

    EDIT needed 2xposting for emphasis and nhl fight for realism...ammidooinitrite?
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."

  12. #14492
    Member Hillz's Avatar
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    my kids love that shit, and danny green is a midland legend! 6056 click boi!! haha
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  13. #14493
    Member AZAZL's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GsxInShed View Post
    Why..?

    'Cause an underperforming brainstorm program has to occasionally dredge the bottom of the barrel to attempt to gratify viewers with a passing interest in the protagonists.

    Did you say reality TV..? this shit is not even close to reality......wtf??

    - - - Updated - - -



    Why..?

    'Cause an under performing brainstorm program,close to failure... has to occasionally dredge the bottom of the barrel to attempt to gratify viewers with a passing interest in the protagonists.

    Did you say reality TV..? this shit is not even close to reality......wtf??

    EDIT needed 2xposting for emphasis and nhl fight for realism...ammidooinitrite?
    Mea culpa. yes. Unreality TV.


    Quote Originally Posted by Hillz View Post
    my kids love that shit, and danny green is a midland legend! 6056 click boi!! haha
    I fail. No TV but curious. Visions of punchups.

  14. #14494
    Member datsikk's Avatar
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  15. #14495
    Member chew's Avatar
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    They hung a sign up in our town "If you live it up, you won't live it down"-Tom Waits

  16. #14496
    Member Geeman's Avatar
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    Required reading 🤣🤣

    Sent from my SM-G950F using Tapatalk
    Knowledge without mileage equals bullshit

  17. #14497
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hillz View Post
    my kids love that shit, and danny green is a midland legend! 6056 click boi!! haha

  18. #14498
    Member Dr. Venkman's Avatar
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    I reckon they stuck Danny in there just to give Mundine the shits


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    DO NOT TOUCH - Probably the most unsettling thing to read in braille.

  19. #14499
    Member BigBoss's Avatar
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    Some people are like slinkies, dont do much but are fun to push down stairs.

  20. #14500
    Member Hillz's Avatar
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