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Thread: For funny emails/jokes/vids/pics - that dont deserve their own thread

  1. #14601
    Member Deborah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chew View Post
    Needs a Hello, my name is Inigo Mulloway.
    You gilled my father. Prepare to fry.
    Top three reasons my jokes are like immunisations: (1) I think they make the world a better place (2) They sometimes sting a little (3) Not enough people get them.
    Likes Brock32, chew liked this post

  2. #14602
    Member Para045's Avatar
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    - - - Updated - - -

    #1 Gold Ticket Holder for the Barfridge Fan Club
    Quote Originally Posted by Phildo View Post
    Noted. We'll check back on that one in three years
    Quote Originally Posted by filbert View Post
    i'll pretend you didn't know she was 13

    98 BADASS TITANIUM BLACKBIRD - Past bikes 1982 XS250 Yamaha & 1983 CB750F with 900 motor
    Ozblackbird.net Administrator

  3. #14603
    Member GsxInShed's Avatar
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    What did hipster Santa leave you , Para..?
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."

  4. #14604
    Member Para045's Avatar
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    #1 Gold Ticket Holder for the Barfridge Fan Club
    Quote Originally Posted by Phildo View Post
    Noted. We'll check back on that one in three years
    Quote Originally Posted by filbert View Post
    i'll pretend you didn't know she was 13

    98 BADASS TITANIUM BLACKBIRD - Past bikes 1982 XS250 Yamaha & 1983 CB750F with 900 motor
    Ozblackbird.net Administrator

  5. #14605
    Member Goliath's Avatar
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    My favourite christmas cartoon. I watch it every year. Thanks internet.


  6. #14606
    Member Deborah's Avatar
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    Top three reasons my jokes are like immunisations: (1) I think they make the world a better place (2) They sometimes sting a little (3) Not enough people get them.
    Likes Tim the PM liked this post

  7. #14607
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    ^^ Haahhahhaa Nailed it!!! ^^
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."
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  8. #14608
    Member Deborah's Avatar
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    Top three reasons my jokes are like immunisations: (1) I think they make the world a better place (2) They sometimes sting a little (3) Not enough people get them.
    Likes dwillia liked this post

  9. #14609
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    hard enough avoiding car changing lanes with no indicator on a motorcycle let alone a fixed gear

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BsQeI_AlX8h/
    Impossible to walk in this muck, no footing at all.
    Likes CbrRider81, dobby liked this post

  10. #14610
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    Hi, Fred, this is Richard, next door. I've got a confession to make.
    I've been riddled with guilt for a few months and have been trying to get up the courage to tell you face-to-face. At least I'm telling you in this text and I can't live with myself a minute longer without you knowing about this. The truth is that when you're not around I've been sharing your wife, day and night. In fact, probably much more than you. I haven't been getting it at home recently and I know that that's no excuse. The temptation was just too great. I can't live with the guilt and hope you'll accept my sincere apology and forgive me. Please suggest a fee for usage and I'll pay you.


    Regards, Richard

    NEIGHBOR'S RESPONSE:

    Fred, feeling so angered and betrayed, grabbed his gun and shot Richard --killing him.
    He went back home and poured himself a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa.

    Fred then looked at his phone and discovered a second
    Text message from Richard.

    SECOND TEXT MESSAGE:

    Hi, Fred. Richard here again. Sorry about the typo on my last text. I expect you figured it out and noticed that the @!*+ed Auto-Correct had changed "wi-fi" to "wife." Technology, huh? It'll be the death of us all.

    Regards, Richard
    Likes Para045 liked this post

  11. #14611
    Member Dr. Venkman's Avatar
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    The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical assistance.

    He called her into his office and said "You graduated university and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000 minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

    The secretary thought for a moment and then replied "Everything but my earrings".


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
    DO NOT TOUCH - Probably the most unsettling thing to read in braille.

  12. #14612
    PSB Statesman Dubs's Avatar
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    A couple, both age 78, went to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asked, "What can I do for you?"

    The man said, "Will you watch us have sex?"

    The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.

    When the couple finished, the doctor said, "There's nothing wrong with the way you have sex," and charged them $50.

    This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have sex with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.

    Finally, the doctor asked, "Just exactly what are you trying to find out?"

    "We're not trying to find out anything," the husband replied.
    "She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50...and I get $43 back from Medicare.

  13. #14613
    Member GsxInShed's Avatar
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    Talk about Irony......

    Sent from my Redmi Note 4X using Tapatalk
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."
    Likes Goliath liked this post

  14. #14614
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    Quote Originally Posted by GsxInShed View Post
    Talk about Irony......

    Sent from my Redmi Note 4X using Tapatalk
    very handy for your friendly neighborhood Motard rider, spray the chicks as you go past to avoid hazardous leaks :-)
    Impossible to walk in this muck, no footing at all.

  15. #14615
    Member GsxInShed's Avatar
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    I'm certain you have capsicum spray confused with wd-40...?
    " Imagination is the seed of life..."

  16. #14616
    PSB Statesman Dubs's Avatar
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    A little old lady went to buy cat food. She picked up three cans, but was told by the clerk, "I'm sorry, but we can't sell this to you without proof you have a cat. Too many seniors are buying cat foot to eat. Management wants proof that you are buying this for your cat." So the lady went home, brought in her cat and was sold the cat food. . . .

    The next day, she tried to buy two cans of dog food and was again told she couldn't buy them without proof. So the lady went home, brought in her dog and was sold the dog food. . . .
    One day later, she brought in a box with a hole in the lid and asked the cashier to stick her finger in the hole. The cashier said, "No, you might have a snake in there."

    The lady assured her that there was nothing in the box that would harm her. So the cashier put her finger into the box, quickly pulled it out and exclaimed, "That smells like crap." . . . The lady replied, "It is. I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

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